Losing Myself
by SomberSoul3
Summary: Katara has lived in the Fire Nation for as long as she can remember, but everything she thought she knew comes to a halt when her adopted parents tell her she was rescued in a snowstorm as a child in the South Pole. She sets out on a journey to discover her identity as a stowaway on a ship - a ship that belongs to none other than the Fire Nation Prince she's heard so much about...
1. Prologue

Losing Myself

_Prologue_

_I remember my mother used to speak to me every night as she tucked me into bed. Sometimes, she'd lull me to sleep with songs custom to our tribe, but most nights, she'd recite exciting tales about the different bending nations and the Avatar. I would always stare up at her, my eyes twinkling in fascination, as she gestured enthusiastically to bring her stories to life._

_I can still hear her voice, sweet and gentle; as if it were just yesterday she tucked me in…_

_At the end of each tale, she'd always make sure to remind me how beautiful I am and to never forget who I am on the inside because "that's what matters most." She made me promise that I'd follow my own path in life and that I'd never lose myself along the way._

_I was still too young to understand what she meant then, but of course I made the promise without hesitation._

_Now, I'm afraid I've broken that promise. I'm not sure who I am or what I stand for. I have no idea what to think anymore._

_I am so lost._

* * *

The sun had begun its evening descent toward the horizon, leaving the sky above the Southern Water Tribe's village painted with an array of fiery colors. Another day was coming to an end, much to the village's inhabitants' relief as the Fire Nation hadn't returned to menace them during one of their infamous raids.

Fire Nation troops had intruded the tribe's territory so often the villagers began to dreadfully anticipate their next arrival each day. And every time they returned to the Southern Water Tribe, they stole more Waterbenders from their home to imprison them. However, only one Waterbender remained in the tribe – a young girl, not yet old enough to even practice her gift.

Her parents were almost certain the Fire Nation were oblivious to their daughter's bending ability, however they remained cautious for her safety. If the Firelord caught wind of another Waterbender residing in the Southern Water Tribe, there was no doubt he'd send for her capture, too.

"Katara!" The Waterbender's mother called out to her daughter from the entrance of their hut. "It's getting late, not much longer now!"

Katara often spent her mornings learning to sew and cook among other house chores with her mother, but her afternoons were spent freely and she enjoyed playing with her brother and the other children that lived in the village.

"Okay, Mom!" the young girl called back to her mother, her mouth falling into a slight pout. She turned back toward her brother, whom she had been having a snowball fight with, and ducked out of the way of a snowball he had hurled in her direction. She gathered snow into her own hands, shaping it into a ball, a mischievous glint in her blue eyes.

Katara tossed the snowball at her brother's face, landing a direct hit. She giggled as her brother scowled and reached for more snow to retaliate, when suddenly, what looked to be gray snow began falling from the sky.

The young Waterbender gazed up at the sky curiously, then down at her hands which were now covered in the gray substance. She rubbed her mittens together in an attempt to clean them, but only smudged the gray dots across the fabric. It was soot.

Not far from where the Water Tribe was established, large, metal ships had arrived on shore, emblazoned with the Fire Nation's symbol across each of their hulls. Thick, black smoke pumped from their engines and mixed with the snowfall, blanketing the village in soot.

Fire Nation soldiers could be seen making their way into the village as the people watched after them in fear.

"Get Mom!" Katara's brother commanded, the urgency in his voice not allowing her to hesitate for even a second.

Katara turned on her heel and ran toward the hut her mother had retreated into earlier, screeching to an absolute halt when she came to the sight of a tall man, dressed in a Fire Nation uniform standing before her mother. The black and red symbolic colors were enough to form a knot in her stomach.

"Mom…?" The girl's eyes averted to her mother, her features twisted in fear.

"It's alright, honey, I'll deal with this," the woman assured her frightened daughter, "Go find your father."

Katara remained in place, somewhat stunned.

"You heard your mother," came the man's gruff voice, sending shivers down Katara's spine. He turned his head slightly toward the girl, revealing his face beneath his helmet. Her blue eyes met his fiery irises for a split second. "Leave us."

With that icy command, Katara darted outside where storm clouds were beginning to form above the village. She continued running until she caught a glimpse of the familiar silhouettes of her father and brother, fighting more Fire Nation soldiers alongside each other.

"Dad!" she cried from afar, her hands balled into fists anxiously as she watched her father press the end of his spear threateningly against one of the soldier's throats. "It's Mom! There's a man in the hut with her!"

Her father and brother exchanged alarmed expressions before quickly disposing of the Fire Nation soldiers, leaving them unconscious in the snow and starting for their hut. The storm looming overhead had begun with sharp flurries and was worsening by the minute.

Katara shielded her face from the freezing winds and clung to her brother's arm as they trudged through the snow as fast as they could. They arrived just in time to catch the Fire Nation soldier exiting their hut. Katara's father raised his spear at the man immediately.

"What have you done with my wife!" he demanded with an angry bellow, his blue eyes ablaze with anger, "Answer me!" He advanced toward the soldier, still gripping his spear.

"I had orders to dispose of the last Waterbender in the South Pole and I did just that," the soldier sneered, maintaining his composure.

Katara and her brother stared in horror at the man's words.

"Now I suggest you lower your weapon and get out of my way before you meet a similar fate," the soldier continued in his low growl.

Katara's father, his eyes now glassy, could only let out an anguished cry as he charged at the soldier with his spear. The Fire Nation soldier responded with a grounded punch, releasing a stream of fire along with it.

Having never witnessed any bender's ability to control the elements or her father in life-threatening danger, Katara's first instinct was to screech in fear and run. And she did just that.

"Katara!" her brother called after his retreating sister, "_Katara_!" He glanced back at the soldier, who was now holding his father by the collar of his coat with one hand and raising a concentrated flame with his other hand.

The boy charged at the soldier, knocking him into the snow. "Just get out of here!" he barked at the man, standing his ground protectively in front of his father. "You've fulfilled your orders, now leave!" he choked out, fighting back tears.

The Fire Nation soldier spared their lives that night, but one life would be changed forever…

* * *

Katara continued to run, although she had slowed from her initial sprint as her adrenaline rush dwindled. Her feet grew heavier as she struggled to plow through the snow that was deepening with the storm's precipitation. The wind stung against her face that was too numb to feel the tears streaming down her cheeks. She had been running for what seemed like hours and could barely see through the snow whisking around her in every direction. She was alone, cold, and scared.

She stood still for a moment and glanced around, trying to make out something – anything – in the distance. All there was to see was snow. She began to walk in one direction in hopes of catching a glimpse of something familiar.

"Dad?" she muttered, more for comfort than anything else. After a few minutes of walking, she could make out a tall silhouette in the distance. It was a man!

"Dad!" Katara called out. The child's fatigue got the best of her and she began running toward the silhouette without a thought of its identity. "Daddy, it's me! Katara!"

As she drew closer, the shape of a pointed helmet was evident upon the man's head and she stopped dead in her tracks. The man approached her and she noticed the details of his Fire Nation uniform.

Gasping in realization, Katara began to step backwards away from the soldier.

"Hey, wait!" the man protested, hastening toward her.

"Get away!" squealed Katara and she turned away from her pursuer, her arms swinging with her. Behind her, the snow settling on a nearby ledge responded to her arms' movements and toppled on to the Fire Nation soldier. He gazed up at the girl's retreating figure, bewildered, but then began chasing her once more.

"Come back!" he called out, running after her.

Katara ran as fast as she could, but her exhaustion was beginning to take a toll on her. Before she knew what had happened, her legs gave way right beneath her and she fell headfirst toward the ground. Her forehead smacked hard against something seemingly invisible, and then everything went blank.


	2. Chapter One

**Losing Myself**

_Chapter One_

"Well, what are we supposed to do with her?"

"You can't hand her over to the Firelord! She's just a child!"

"And you'd have me betray my own nation? What if we're caught smuggling a _Waterbender_!?"

"This isn't about politics, this is a child's life!"

"Wait, I think she's waking up!"

Katara's eyes fluttered open slowly, a tiny moan escaping her lips. Squinting in the candlelight, she made out two figures standing before her. As her vision adjusted to the dim lighting, the details of both silhouettes became clear. Both faces were pinched with worry as they watched the young girl awaken; one was a man, the other a woman. Two pairs of eyes stared down at her expectantly.

It was then Katara realized she didn't recognize these two people or even where she was. She sprang up with a startled gasp and backed away from her spectators until her back was pressed against a wall behind her. She took notice of the bed beneath her and grasped the sheets, pulling them to her face. Her blue eyes, now wide with fear, remained fixated on the strangers.

The woman's expression was now replaced with sympathy at the girl's reaction. "Oh, poor thing, she must feel lost." The woman's dark hair was tied back in a long ponytail and her burgundy night gown shifted with her as she straightened her posture.

"Well, Xia?" The man turned toward the woman, "What do you propose we do?" His hair fell to his shoulders, a few strands framing his stern features. His face was aged, yet his body stood tall and sturdy. Exhaustion was evident in the tiny wrinkles between his eyebrows and under his eyes.

Xia glanced at her husband, then turned back to the frightened child. Her face softened. "Don't be afraid," she coaxed gently, approaching Katara, "We're not here to hurt you. We want to help you."

Katara simply whimpered quietly in response.

"What's your name?" offered Xia, a tiny smile playing on her lips.

Katara opened her mouth to reply, but the answer did not form on her tongue as she expected it to. How could she not respond? What _was _her name? Her eyes lowered to the ground as she sifted through her own thoughts in an attempt to recall who she was.

"You don't remember your name…?" Xia asked softly.

"She said her name was Katara," came the man's voice from behind his wife, "She called herself Katara."

"Does that sound right?" Xia asked the girl hopefully. "Is your name Katara?"

Katara finally looked up from the ground, her eyes glassy, "I don't know…" She brought her hands to her face to wipe at her tears when she felt the bandage around her forehead. "Ouch!" she gasped with a wince, "…what happened to my head?"

"Anaru told me earlier that you fell and hit your head," explained Xia, motioning toward her husband, "He's helped you home now, you're safe." She smiled warmly. "You just need some rest, I'm sure you'll feel much better in the morning."

Katara's eyes softened at the woman's words and she eased forward, relieved of the tension that nudged her into the corner earlier. She allowed Xia to adjust the sheets and pillows before sinking into the blankets and drifting off into a light slumber.

Once they were sure the young girl was asleep, Xia and Anaru crept from the bedroom and into the kitchen. They shared the silence for a few moments, both looking indecisive.

"Well…?" Anaru's voice finally filled the empty air as he turned to his wife expectantly, his arms folded across his chest.

Sighing, Xia met his gaze, "I don't see how we're going to transport her anywhere in her condition."

"And when she recovers?" inquired Anaru, raising his eyebrows.

"Can't you just return her to the Southern Water Tribe?" Xia suggested matter-of-factly, "It's obvious that's where she came from."

The Fire Nation soldier shook his head at his wife, "The reason we were there in the first place was to dispose of the last Waterbender living there. The Fire Nation will not have any business in the South for a long time…"

Xia furrowed her brow, "Is this girl the Waterbender you were searching for?"

"I don't know if she's a Waterbender or not, I told you the snow falling may have just been a mere coincidence! If she is a bender, she definitely doesn't know it yet. It was probably kept from her to ensure her safety."

"I doubt her memory will be restored anyway," Xia muttered with a frown. She glanced at her husband, a faint twinkle in her eyes. "We could keep her, you know."

"Are you crazy!?" exclaimed Anaru incredulously, the candlelight jumping in response to his sudden change in demeanor, "I could lose my job. We'd lose everything we have! There might even be more severe punishments for a crime like this!"

Scowling, Xia narrowed her eyes at her husband, "I'm trying to help a little girl who already _has_ lost everything. If memory serves me correctly, I moved into the Fire Nation for _you_ and no other reason. I have no respect for, nor any desire to follow, the smothering laws this screwed up monarchy is shoving down everyone's throats."

Anaru's face fell at his wife's sharp words, inwardly wincing at her bitter honesty.

"Now, I want to help Katara," continued Xia, "And I know you do, too. You would have just left her in that ravine if you didn't care. This isn't about politics or your job or our status as "loyal subjects" to the Fire Lord – this is about life or death. And I will not have that girl's blood on my hands. We will keep her safe here, for as long as she needs us."

"And what of her descent? And her Waterbending?" Anaru still wasn't convinced.

"We can easily replace her old memories with new ones," Xia replied simply. With that, she turned on her heel and exited the kitchen on light footsteps, leaving her husband alone.

Sighing, Anaru buried his face in his hands. He knew there was no changing his wife's mind once it was made up. And, admittedly, he did agree with her morality on the subject. It was settled: they would be raising a strange Waterbender child in the Fire Nation.

Removing his hands from his face, Anaru's eyes caught sight of the leather choker he had placed on the table earlier. He reached for the necklace and examined it delicately. It had unfastened and fallen from the young girl's neck when she'd tripped into the ravine that night. There was a pendant on the front of the choker – the blue Water Tribe symbol.

Sighing once more, he buried it in his pocket.

* * *

_Six years later…_

A young girl with richly tanned skin maneuvered her way through the busy marketplace on swift footsteps. The top layers of her long brown hair were pulled back and held in place by a clasp in the shape of a flame, while the bottom layer was gathered into two ponytails that hung down past her shoulders on opposite sides of her head. The rest of her hair was loose and fell to her waist.

"Careful, Ziera!" She reached for the hand of the small girl who had been struggling to keep up with her.

"Slow down, Katara!" protested Ziera, looking up at the taller girl with a scowl.

Katara simply adjusted the basket of fruit she was carrying and continued to push through the crowded streets, dragging her younger sister behind her. Both girls were garbed in outfits that were comprised of various shades of red and burgundy – the common ensemble of Fire Nation citizens.

Katara's red off-the-shoulder top was sleeveless and tied at her side to reveal her stomach. Her dark pants fit loosely and left her ankles bare. A layer of thin cloth that matched her shirt wrapped around her waist, covering her legs, and three smaller pieces of darker fabric overlapped it. Her gold sandals wrapped around her ankles and matched the gold arm and wrist bands she wore.

Ziera 's dark hair was pulled back in a tight bun by a gold clasp, a few strands falling loosely over her pale face. She was still clad in her school uniform, minus the uncomfortable vest that she had ripped off the second she exited the school building and slung over her shoulder.

Soon they reached their house on the far east side of town and pushed past the red curtains that hung in the entrance's doorway.

"Xia, we're back!" Katara called out as she made her way into the kitchen and placed the basket of fruits on the table.

"Finally!" Ziera sighed, tugging at her bun and letting her black hair fall to her shoulders.

"Welcome back," Xia greeted them warmly, appearing in the doorway. She patted her daughter's head affectionately and glanced at the fruit basket. "Oh, you remembered the papayas this time!"

"Unfortunately," Katara replied with a sour face, "I still need to fetch fresh water from the well in town for tonight's supper."

"Well, then you'd better hurry along so we can get started before Anaru returns home," suggested Xia.

"When will Daddy be home!?" Ziera wondered aloud, turning toward her mother.

"Shouldn't be longer than an hour now," assured Xia.

"Can I go with Katara!?" Ziera pleaded enthusiastically, her amber eyes wide.

"Of course," Xia replied, smiling.

"I'll need help carrying those heavy buckets full of water," added Katara with a smirk. She turned toward Xia, "We'll be back soon."

The two girls exited the house, each carrying a wooden bucket. They walked in silence for a moment or two before Ziera decided to speak.

"Katara, why do you call Mommy and Daddy by different names?" Ziera's eyes twinkled curiously.

Katara heaved a tiny sigh before replying, "We've been over this a thousand times, Zie. I'm not their child, they adopted me."

"But how!?" Ziera demanded, "Did they steal you from another family!?"

"No, your father found me abandoned during one of his patrols in the city," explained Katara, her face falling at the thought.

"But why were you alone if you were just a baby?"

"My guess is as good as yours," Katara answered quietly, her blue eyes fixated on the ground.

"Were you a misfit? Like Prince Zuko!?" Ziera's eyes lit up in excitement.

"How do you know about the Prince?" Katara cocked an eyebrow at the younger girl.

"We learned about him in school! The Prince of the Fire Nation: banished from his own home for speaking against the almighty Fire Lord! He's a traitor, he's - !"

"Ziera, don't talk like that!" Katara interrupted in a harsh whisper, trying to ignore the stares Ziera had attracted.

"I'm only repeating what the teacher says…" Ziera insisted, scowling.

The two girls finally arrived at the well on the outskirts of town and filled their buckets with fresh water.

"Come on, let's get this water back to the house so we can prepare dinner before your dad gets home," Katara said to Ziera as they turned back toward their house.

"Well if it isn't the freak of the town and her little pet."

Katara winced at the voice that came from behind her and the collective snickers that followed.

"What is it this time, Neikani?" Katara refused to turn and face the girl that had been tormenting her ever since she was a child.

"Oh, nothing," the girl replied mockingly, "I just thought you might need help with your buckets."

Katara felt the bully's hands shove against her back and she fell forward, dropping her bucket. The group of kids behind Neikani laughed loudly in amusement.

"Go back from where ever you came from, freak," continued Neikani with a smirk as she pushed her black bangs out of her face, "Oh wait, your real parents didn't want you either!"

Katara winced inwardly at the girl's words, but remained silent as she picked up her bucket and started back toward the well.

Neikani turned to follow her when a screech from Ziera froze her in place.

"You leave my sister alone!" Ziera cried, tossing her bucket aside and charging at Neikani. She aimed her fists at the girl and to everyone's surprise, small flames accompanied her swings.

"Get your freak pet away from me!" Neikani yelled at Katara, pushing the child to the ground forcefully.

Ziera's face crumpled and she looked toward Katara helplessly.

Katara whirled around to face Neikani, her eyes fiery and her hands balled into fists. "I have _had _it with you! Who do you think you are anyway!? I've never done anything to you, yet I've had to listen to your big fat mouth ever since I was a kid! I am not dealing with you or any other bullies anymore, understand!?"

Katara's words were accompanied by angry gestures and the group of teenagers began slowly retreating.

A rumbling sound caught Neikani's attention and she averted her eyes to nearby jugs of water that were trembling seemingly for no reason. "Um…Katara…"

"Don't even _dare _use my name, you little rat!" Katara retorted, her voice still rising, "If I _ever _see you come near me or Ziera again, I won't hold back like I am now! _This ends here_!"

With her final shout, Katara's arms swiped through the air one last time. Much to everyone's surprise, the water in the well spurted out ferociously in response to her movements and the jugs that had been shaking finally burst, splashing water everywhere.

Soaking wet, the children all stood in place, their mouths agape. All eyes were on Katara, who was now staring at her own hands in shock.

"Katara…you're a Waterbender!" Ziera shrieked with delight.


End file.
